Happy New Year!

As my title says, Happy New Year! 

I was going to try to recap on the last few months, but I all of a sudden had an inspiration for something else.

Our kids are playing in the kitchen. They have all sorts of HotWheels out which are all lined up side by side sitting inside a really wide track made for another type of car. They've been playing like this for about 1/2 hour, talking in high-pitched voices, making the cars interact. Mom (that's me) walks by and randomly tosses a squishy football-shaped pig into the kitchen. It lands right in between the two kids; and, like toy manna from heaven, Moira sees it and says in her high-pitched play voice, "OH!! (regular voice) Caden, pretend there was a pig coming in for a landing. (resume high-pitched play voice)" I laughed because it was almost like she was just waiting for the pig to enter the scene; and, right on cue, Mom throws it in providing yet another element to their fantastic play world. Our kids are pretty good with spontaneity... just flyin' by the seat of their pants sometimes.

When I was younger, (let's say... before kids and earlier) being spontaneous was essential to my well-being. I thrived with spontaneity. I didn't like sitting around doing nothing... well, to a point. I was always going to my friends' houses, running "in town" for yet another shopping trip for non essentials, Don and I going out on dates several times a week and being invited over to friends' and family's houses.

Once we started having kids, spontaneity became harder to accomplish - especially with baby schedules and nursing and work. Things start to get more predictable, and we still would get to go out fairly frequently... then there's another baby... then another. It's amazing to me how hard it is to be spontaneous now! It's not that I hate it. I still enjoy being spontaneous, but I find myself being comfortable with sitting still. These days, rigidity in the schedule is comforting, predictable, not stressful. Deviation from "a plan" causes stress and frustration. (depending on what the deviation is and who is causing it, of course)

Of course, there are days where Mommy and Daddy have to be creative; and a spontaneous play date or trip to the zoo comes to call. These trips don't feel so spontaneous but more like "sanity trips." Get-me-out-of-the-house-and-give-them-more-room-to-be-loud-and-run-around trips.

After paying attention to the kids' play this morning, I guess I fear that I've lost that fun/spontaneity side of me. Maybe it's just a normal part of being a parent... and maybe, hopefully, I can get all that back when the kids get older.  :) That was always a fun thing for me.